What's Eating Gilbert Grape

The first time I saw What's Eating Gilbert Grape, it was predominately because Johnny Depp was in it. While I watched the movie, I was amazed by the "kid" portraying Arnie Grape; it was the first time I saw Leonardo DiCaprio. Leonardo's performance of a 17 year old with developmental disabilities was so outstanding, I was floored when I saw The Man in the Iron Mask and realized that Leonardo didn't actually have a developmental disability. The first time I watched What's Eating Gilbert Grape, I was very uncomfortable. This movie excels at making the viewer feel trapped, like Gilbert feels. When Becky (Juliette Lewis) arrives in the film, she is a breath of fresh air. To be honest, her character speaks in ways that were foreign and weird to me, but I fully embrace today. This movie was powerful enough for me to own on DVD and watch enough times that I remembered a lot of it as I watched it again at the beginning of July.

As much as I j'adore Leonardo Di Carprio, Johnny Depp and Juliette Lewis in this movie, this time, I was struck by Darlene Cates, the woman who played Bonnie Grape. Her storyline of being obese to the point of Gilbert having to reinforce the floor of their house so it won't collapse and Bonnie not leaving the house (except to get Arnie from jail, which is a HUGE scene in the movie) is as much gut wrenching as riveting. At one point in the film, Bonnie expresses what I think all us BBWs feel at some point or another --- complete and utter, full-on shame and regret at what we have become. She expresses how she wasn't always obese and she didn't want to be that way. I felt that scene in my core. Darlene Cates is not a skinny woman in a fat suit. This isn't movie make up that deserves an award. Nope. Darlene Cates was discovered by the director when he saw her on a talk show discussing what it is like to be obese. When offered the role, Darlene was scared of the risk of being in the movie; she wanted to be sure that her character would have integrity. She was very happy with how Bonnie Grape was portrayed in the movie. It takes a lot of courage for someone to be so publicly obese. Being that there are more days than I'd like where I want to hide in the room all Gregor Samsa like and I feel every inch of mass I take up; just being 40 pounds lighter can't come fast enough, I watched this movie differently this time around. I related. I found I have as much deep compassion and reverence for the character Bonnie Grape as I do for the actress who portrayed her. I even downloaded the book to read and researched about Darlene Cates' life. She got married, had kids and grandkids. She lost and gained weight and had sporadic roles on television and in movies until her death in March 2017. What's Eating Gilbert Grape is one of those movies that I love more now than ever for its authenticity in dealing with difficult subject matter, including how obesity can affect an entire family.

May you all walk in peace and inspiration, not fearing what the world thinks, my most excellent peeps.

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